The Best High School Yearbook (Parody) Ever!

Posted on June 2, 2012 by

I will admit right up front that I love high school yearbooks – any and all.

This love affair most likely began in June 1961 when I was a mere child of eight.  My big brother, who was finishing up his junior year, brought home his yearbook.  (For whatever reason, I don’t believe he bought the yearbooks from his freshman and sophomore years, probably because they cost some outlandish amount of money like $7.)  However, I was riveted by that 1961 yearbook filled with photos of attractive teenagers and their many activities.  And it was even better the following year when I could see my own brother in many of the photos that chronicled his senior year.  I was probably fascinated all the more because, as the editor of his yearbook, my brother talked about its production throughout the school year.

Fast forward seven or eight years to my own high school days.  Again, due to cost, I didn’t purchase my freshman yearbook.  However, after that, I made sure that a copy was reserved for me come June.  It was great fun pouring over the pictures and collecting the signatures of friends, classmates, and teachers.  And, like my brother, I ended up as an editor-in-chief of the yearbook in my senior year, too.

The humor of a high school yearbook wasn’t lost on me.  Certainly, there were photos of teachers that produced snickers.  There were names of underclassmen that were funny.  Occasionally, there was a photo that was humorously awkward.  Sometimes inappropriate things managed to sneak in without the adult advisors catching them.  Take, for instance, this group shot of my homeroom class that appeared in the 1969 edition of my high school yearbook.  Note that there are definitely two, possibly three, obscene gestures.  Indeed, this particular yearbook is positively filled with obscene gestures that passed muster and weren’t censored.

I think I have now established the fact that high school yearbooks always have appealed to me, so you can imagine my delight when National Lampoon published the National Lampoon 1964 High School Yearbook Parody in 1974. (That’s the copyright date on the old copy I’m looking at.  According to Wikipedia, it was published in 1973.) It was a yearbook that was very reminiscent of my brother’s yearbooks of the early 1960’s and really not all that different from the yearbooks of my own high school years in the late 1960’s.  Of course, the cover that would be displayed on the newsstand was ever so slightly different.

It foretold of the naughty, sometimes vulgar, but always hysterically funny delights that awaited inside the magazine.  Anyone who has ever perused an American high school yearbook instantly recognizes the format the minute they turn the magazine over and see the cover of the 1964 Kaleidoscope out of Dacron, Ohio’s C. Estes Kefauver High School

and then begin turning the pages to uncover the messages  from the principal and superintendent, the title page and contents page, the dedication, the in memorium, etc.  (Obviously, Dacron sounds a lot like Akron.  For us younger folks who don’t remember him, C. Estes Kefauver was Adlai Stevenson’s vice presidential running mate in 1956.)

The National Lampoon yearbook parody is pure genius.  I defy anyone who has ever been a high school student to read through it and not break out into peals of laughter when he recognizes some lame/inane aspect of his own high school experience.  Take, for instance, one of the pages from the senior section

or the “Best of the Class” page.

Everything is spot on, from the inscriptions written by students and teachers to the owner of the yearbook, one Larry Kroger, to the local ads at the back of the yearbook.

The freshman page is just one example of the depth and breadth of humor throughout the book.  Over fifteen hundred teeny tiny faces are crammed onto the page, not one of which would be remotely recognizable without a magnifying glass.  Below are the names of the students, names like G. Willikers, V. Neck, E. Leet, T. Bone, B. Ware, and O. Kay.  Somehow, you just picture the writers of this parody sitting around a table throwing out every crazy letter and word combination they can think of, each one trying to top the other.

While on the subject of the writers, I should note that the head writers and editors of this parody are Doug Kenney, a founder of National Lampoon Magazine and later a co-writer of National Lampoon’s Animal House and Caddyshack, and P. J. O’Rourke, who today is a well-respected author and political satirist.  Indeed, O’Rourke got into the spirit of things while working on the yearbook parody and appears as female gym teacher, Miss Marilyn Armbruster.  As seen on the activities page below, Miss Armbruster was also  advisor to the Hall Monitors.

And if that previously mentioned name, Larry Kroger, and the movie Animal House ring any bells, it’s because Doug Kenney used the yearbook parody as a jumping off point for the movie and some of its characters.

As if the yearbook isn’t enough, there’s more high school nostalgia at the back of the magazine.  Here, one finds parodies of the school’s basketball program, the school newspaper, the literary magazine, the U.S. history book, Larry Kroger’s permanent record and his English IV final exam.

The original price of the National Lampoon 1964 High School Yearbook Parody was $2.50.  A few months after its publication, I purchased a copy for a mere $1.25 at a local discount magazine stand where they offered half-price publications with their titles cut off.  Considering the number of giggles and guffaws it has produced, it’s absolutely priceless.

A few years back, I managed to find an intact original copy in good condition for a few dollars and snapped it up.  And just a month ago, I was rooting through boxes of cookbooks at a yard sale when I spotted a rather skinny little paperback book squashed between two larger books.  As soon as I read the title on the spine, I scooped it up for fifty cents.  Recently, on eBay, copies of the magazine have sold from a low of $3 on up to $60.  The average price is around $20-$25.  Clearly, I’m not the only one who appreciates the humor in this book.

Yes, I like yearbooks, any and all.  When I find a real vintage yearbook at a yard sale or flea market that’s $5 or less, I’ll usually buy it.  I may keep it or sell it, but I always flip through it and read it.  Yearbooks are genuine time capsules of that unique period in life called high school.  I’ve never met one I didn’t like, but the one I like the most isn’t a real yearbook at all.  It’s an insanely creative compilation of every high school yearbook ever published, and it’s as funny today as it was nearly forty years ago.

Thank you, National Lampoon. Whenever I need a good belly laugh, I know exactly where to turn.

Addendum by Ben:

My parents introduced me to the National Lampoon’s hilarious 1964 yearbook parody when I was a junior in high school, at a time when I was already pointing out some of the absurdity in my own yearbooks (although unlike my mom, I did not serve on my school’s yearbook staff). Since then, I have revisited the book dozens of times over the years, only to find new jokes that I somehow managed to miss even after countless readings.

I don’t know if the National Lampoon staff thought that nearly 40 years after its publication that people who weren’t even alive to read it the first time would find it funny, but I think it speaks to the concept of yearbooks in general. They are a high school tradition that might change a little bit, but by and large, they are a part of high school that will remain the same and never go away.

In my senior yearbook, I used the opportunity to make a few references to this particular yearbook. I said I was frequently seen with Madison Avenue Jones, a transfer student from a pre-Civil Rights era who is almost always obscured in photographs throughout the yearbook. I also said I was a member of our school’s Slide Rule Club, even though I’ve never used a slide rule in my life.

Perhaps growing up surrounded by antiques makes me a prime candidate for enjoying something like this that was hearkening back to a bygone era even when it was published, but I get the feeling that anyone who has handled a yearbook (i.e. every high school graduate) can find something like this hilarious. If I had crazy amounts of money to spend on whatever pet project I could conceive, I would build the Estes Kefauver High School and make it into a shrine to this one issue of National Lampoon. That’s how much I absolutely love this yearbook.

I have a few friends who have discovered and enjoyed every page and every detail. This is probably one of the funniest things you will ever experience, so if you can’t find one at a flea market or yard sale like we seem to do with a certain regularity, I think it’s well worth the $20 or $25 investment.

Posted in 1960's, 1970's, Ben, Carol, Ephemera, Humor | 6 Comments

Dr. Hyde

Posted on May 25, 2012 by

I miss having action stars. I really do. Sure, instead of barely coherent, steroid-laden actors like Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stallone killing the living snot out of villains who clearly don’t stand a freaking chance against them, we’ve gotten more complex thrill rides where our heroes are psychologically tortured or up against insurmountable odds or fighting the demons inside themselves more than a living, breathing antagonist. But sometimes, you just want to see the good guys kick ass, and we’ve simply moved away from that time and place.

Stallone is the action star I want to bring up today. While Stallone is past his prime, he’s trying really hard to keep the gritty action movies of the 1980s alive. However, when he was in his prime, he was responsible for two major roles: Rocky Balboa and John Rambo. Stallone might have been built like a rock in the 1980s, and I’m sure he could EASILY take me or an army of me in a fight even today, yet somehow, he had that “average Joe” quality that made it seem like the odds were constantly stacked against him. With Rocky, he went from local meathead boxer in the first one to a superhero who single-handedly ends Communism in the fourth one, and people still LOVE those movies, despite the fact that the people in charge of those movies were clearly losing their minds near the end. Rambo, however, was Stallone’s excuse to get violent and gory, and the film single-handedly inspired literally dozens of Vietnam-veteran-on-the-hunt movies in the 1980s. Viewers lapped it up, as these tended to be about as action-packed as movies could get at the time.

Despite its hard-R rating, Rambo inspired a series of action figures in the 1980s. Now, it should be noted that while SOME of the characters from the movies were the same, most of them were created specifically for Rambo: The Force of Freedom, an animated series LOOSELY based on the movies. After all, the main protagonist was a violent Vietnam War veteran whose post-traumatic stress disorder was a major plot device in the movie series. The writers thought of a great way to alleviate this: make absolutely NO references whatsoever to the plots of the movies, Vietnam, or anything that had any of the Rambo movies worth watching. In other words, you had a shirtless musclebound man running around leading a team of stereotypes against a nefarious group called S.A.V.A.G.E. (Specialist-Administrators of Vengeance, Anarchy and Global Extortion). In other words, it was G.I.Joe…but…it was Rambo, I guess.

Anyway, since Rambo had name brand recognition, Coleco scooped up the rights to make action figures. After Coleco found oodles of success with Cabbage Patch Kids, they sunk that money into creating action figure lines, which were also generating obscene amounts of money in the early 1980s. Coleco’s action figures were a little bit larger than most of the other toys on the market at the time. I don’t know if that ended up helping or hurting them, but at least it meant they stood out. The company created Sectaurs in-house as a fantasy line to compete with He-Man and the Masters of the Universe. Rambo was probably a license meant to compete with kids who enjoyed more military-themed toys like G.I.Joe: A Real American Hero, even though the two lines were not in scale with one another.

As such, the Rambo toy line was loaded with crazy colorful characters, vehicles, and a gigantic playset. The heroes were made up of a multi-racial supergroup who all served specific roles (mechanics, espionage, martial arts, etc.) and a rag tag bunch of complicated villains (a mercenary, the leader of a biker gang, a rival martial artist wearing the opposite color of the good guy martial artist, etc.) The show ran for 65 episodes, but the toys did not sell particularly well, mainly because the characters had a far more generic look than most of the other toys available at the time.

However, there is one notable exception, and after that lengthy introduction, I’m finally ready to talk about him. Meet the evil mad scientist of S.A.V.A.G.E., DR. HYDE!

If there’s one advantage of the cartoon over the movies, is that you can create crazy characters like Dr. Hyde. There is no way this would have worked in a film about the Vietnam War…or any live action movie that attempted to be grounded in some sort of reality. Apparently, this guy has an IQ of 180 and was a dishonorably discharged military surgeon who began attaching cybernetic parts to wounded soldiers. He also surgically altered his own face, although judging by the looks of things, my guess is that he wasn’t too good at it.

A lot of collectors want this figure because he is so unlike anything else in the Rambo line. I had a large collection of generic monster action figures I hoarded as a kid, and if I had owned this figure, he would have fit right in. However, what you are looking at is NOT the super-rare figure that eventually saw release in the United States. You are looking at his super-rare South American counterpart.

The key difference is the dome helmet. The American version is really cool because the dome is completely darkened, and you can only see his face when you activate his light-up mechanism. For a 1980s toy, the end result is surprisingly more effective than most toys with light-up actions of the era (I’m looking at you, Blackstar). When South America got a hold of the molds to make their own figures, they decided it would be too expensive to recreate this light-up feature. Instead, the dome is clear, so you can constantly see Dr. Hyde’s ugly mug. This is one advantage that the South American version has, since many examples of the American Dr. Hyde have stopped working, and if you own one of those, you will never see what Dr. Hyde really looks like.

I picked this up at a toy show about two and a half years ago. The figure is missing all of his accessories (basically, a backpack and some weapons), but it came with a vehicle called the S.A.V.A.G.E. Stormbomber.

This was planned as a second series vehicle, but never saw release in the United States. Like this version of Dr. Hyde, it was released only in South America. In the absence of having all his accessories, I think this vehicle makes Dr. Hyde look a bit more threatening, especially with a few comically large bombs placed on either side of him with no shields or armor whatsoever to protect him. He’s flying into battle and he’ll either kill you or blow himself to Kingdom Come trying!

I paid $75 for the pair, which I thought was more than fair at the time. I wanted to at least have an example of Dr. Hyde in my collection, and good, clean, loose examples of the American version easily sell for upwards of $100, way more than the majority of the other figures in the Rambo line. Plus, it’s not like I constantly run into toys from South America at flea markets or yard sales. The cost of shipping from South America alone makes these toys definitely worthwhile.

I’m sure I will eventually replace this figure with an American one someday, and my hope is that I just stumble upon it in some random lot or box when I’m least expecting it and I’ll pay next to nothing for it. But for now, I think this looks great on a shelf, and it’s certainly not something you’re bound to see in a lot of other collections!

Posted in 1980's, Action Figures, Ben, Monsters, Toys, Weird | 2 Comments

Angela Lansbury And Her Action Bed

Posted on May 17, 2012 by

If you have ever made any attempt to research or collect Disneyana, you know that it is a very vast collecting field and that Disney will put its name on just about any product.  I don’t even want to attempt to think about how many products Mickey Mouse has had his face put on over the past 84 years.  It is mind blowing.  With all of that constant merchandising, you might think that pretty much every major Disney film, character, and TV show has been heavily merchandised, but some have been known to fall through the cracks.  The 1970’s is a great example of a decade where several major projects that Disney churned out went practically unmerchandised, despite being decent movies (though probably not as good as previous Disney movies) that a lot of kids loved.

The 1970’s was a strange decade for Disney.  Walt himself had passed away in 1966, and the company struggled to regain its footing after he was gone.  Not everything Disney did in the ‘70’s was bad, but the quality just wasn’t quite what it had been in previous decades.  Because of these struggles, I think Walt Disney Productions failed to market its 1970’s features half as well as it had marketed movies in the past.  A prime example of this was 1971’s Bedknobs and Broomsticks.  It was a major motion picture with a decent cast of colorful characters, and yet only one toy was ever made for the film.  That toy was the Bedknobs and Broomsticks Action Bed.

This toy was made by Horsman in 1972, and was based on the magic bed in Bedknobs and Broomsticks.  I don’t know if Horsman ever planned to make dolls of any of the other characters from the movie, but by not making anything else they really limited the play value of this toy.  The bed is battery powered.  When you switch it on, it rolls across the floor, and when it bumps into things, it switches direction and keeps going.  A bed alone would have been super lame, so they did produce a single doll that came with it, a doll of Angela Lansbury’s character in the movie, Mrs. Price.

I know what you are thinking. That doll looks exactly like Angela Lansbury!  No?  Well, it was the ‘70’s, and toy companies really didn’t care if they made their toys look exactly like the person they were representing.  I guess kids had more imagination back them and didn’t need their doll to look exactly like Angela Lansbury.  Personally, I think the fact that it really looks nothing like Angela Lansbury adds to the charm and wackiness of the toy.  At least they got the outfit sort of right so you have some idea who this doll is supposed to be.

My example, which my brother gave me for Christmas a few years ago, came with a messed up box.  I still have some panels from the box, but my example is basically a loose, but unplayed-with example.  Still, it is a very rare toy, so I’ll take what I can get.  Honestly, I wanted a loose example anyway, so it all worked out.  The box is all plastic except for a cardboard base for the bed to sit on, so it is very fragile.  Boxed examples do come up every now and again though because I believe this toy was a slow seller, and a lot of the existing examples are old store stock or simply never got played with.  You know, it’s the type of toy a grandparent or weird aunt who doesn’t know what you are really into gives you, and you politely thank them and then shove the toy in a closet and forget about it.

Let’s face it, not every kid in 1972 was jonesing for an Angela Lansbury action figure, and with no other characters from the movie to choose from, I think this toy was pretty much a flop.  However, it is a fascinating little piece of history from the time when the Disney Company was going through its awkward post-Walt Disney phase.  Honestly, Bedknobs and Broomsticks is not a bad movie.  It is better than a lot of the live action movies Disney had produced in decades prior to the 1970’s.  Unfortunately, it exists in the time period between The Jungle Book and The Little Mermaid though, so it doesn’t really get the attention it deserves.

Today this toy appeals to Disney fans as well as collectors of TV and movie dolls and battery-op toys, so it is fairly desirable.  It also appeals to people with cheeky senses of humor who giggle at the thought of Angel Lansbury on her “action bed”.  Even though I enjoy Disneyana, I would be lying if I said that my sense of humor didn’t factor in to why I wanted this toy.

The Bedknobs and Broomsticks Action Bed is a prime example of “What were they thinking?” marketing.  Only making a toy of one character from a movie with a large ensemble cast – what were they thinking?  Choosing Angela Lansbury instead of the relatable-to-children kid characters from the movie –  what were they thinking?  Making a toy of a mature woman on a vibrating action bed – seriously, what were they thinking?!?  The Bedknobs and Broomsticks Action Bed certainly is a special unicorn galloping through the vast field of Disney collectibles.

 

Posted in 1970's, Amy, Disney, Dolls, Toys | 1 Comment

Victory Speed – The Road to Victory was Slow

Posted on May 14, 2012 by

In terms of history, few events have been studied or recounted more than World War II.  From a collecting perspective most of the emphasis has been on militaria.  Collectors are still looking for and paying good money for those war prizes brought home by our GIs and resting in attics and basements across America.  In recent years, more attention is being paid to the objects worn and used by American soldiers and sailors as well.   Few can argue that the “Greatest Generation” did our nation proud and defeated not just one but two determined foes on opposite sides of the world.

It should also be remembered that this was a total war, and every single American was supposed to do his part in winning the final victory.   Everyone on the “home front” was also required to make sacrifices and do without in an effort to make sure the boys overseas had everything they needed to win the war.

Rationing was a big part of the sacrifice.   Prices were frozen on certain commodities such as meat, sugar, tires, and gasoline.  If you didn’t need it, you were supposed to do without it.

Automobile use was limited, and the amount of gas you could get depended on your needs.  About half of America’s cars were considered “nonessential” and issued an “A” sticker to be placed in windshield or rear window.  The “A” sticker was good for three or four gallons a week.  A “B” sticker meant you needed your car to get to and from work and were eligible for 8 gallons a week.  A “C” sticker was reserved for mail carriers, doctors, and people who needed their cars on a regular basis (when doctors made house calls).

No matter how you used your car, however, the maximum speed from May of 1942 through August of 1945 was 35 miles per hour.   To make drivers feel a little better about it, 35 miles per hour was called “Victory Speed”.  The idea was that driving slower would reduce wear and tear on tires as well as use less gas.  Tires were the real problem since the Japanese had overrun the rubber plantations of the Dutch East Indies – where the US imported 90 percent of its rubber.

I recently came across this “Victory Speed” sign at a flea market.  It is painted on a Masonite board, which would make sense given the strategic need for metal in the war effort.   I think it represents an important part of how life changed during the war for nearly everyone.   It should also be noted that seventy years ago we did not yet have an interstate highway system.  The first such highway, the Pennsylvania Turnpike, had only partially opened in 1940 (speed limit was set at 70 after initially having no speed limit).  As a result, it was probably a little easier for people back then to live with such a slow speed.  I can’t imagine how people could live with it today!

I’m sure highway departments all across the country were only too happy to discard these signs once victory was achieved.

Posted in 1940's, Americana, Historical, Jim, Uncategorized, WWII | Leave a comment

Blue Thunder

Posted on May 7, 2012 by

In the early 1980s, if you wanted to be taken seriously as an action star, you had to have some sort of awesome vehicle at your disposal. Michael Knight had K.I.T.T., the A-Team had a modified GMC van, Magnum P.I. had his bright red Ferrari, and two guys named Frank had a modified Aérospatiale Gazelle helicopter called BLUE THUNDER.

Blue Thunder began its pop culture legacy when the movie of the same name was released in 1983. Starring Roy Schnieder (Jaws, Seaquest), Malcom McDowell (Clockwork Orange, almost always evil British guy), and Daniel Stern (the bearded “Wet Bandit” in Home Alone, the bearded “Sticky Bandit” in Home Alone 2), the film had helicopter-pilot-turned-LAPD-officer Frank Murphy (Schnieder) piloting the Blue Thunder, loaded with guns, stealth technology, and an old VCR, the latest step in police surveillance technology because at the time no one had thought of Robocop yet. But then there’s this evil organization, THOR, that’s planning to use helicopters and only helicopters (seriously, they’re organizational acronym means Tactical Helicopter Offensive Response) for what we can be sure are dastardly deeds, because the villain is played by Malcom McDowell, and he’s an odds-on favorite to play a bad guy in basically anything featuring him in the cast. There’s a helicopter showdown at the end, and then Frank Murphy decides to land Blue Thunder on a train track and let it get destroyed because he thinks it’s too dangerous for any one person to control.

But no one stays dead for long in Hollywood, especially state-of-the-art helicopters! Blue Thunder then became a television series, starring a literal Who’s Who of “Holy crap, they were on that show with the helicopter?” This time, the “star” was James Farentino, probably most famous for his role in Dynasty, as Frank Chaney, because I don’t think people would have tuned into a show where the helicopter wasn’t piloted by a guy named Frank. The rest of the cast is insane, though.

This show starred a pre-SNL Dana Carvey as Clinton ‘JAFO’ Wonderlove, the novice sidekick helicopter co-pilot; Bubba Smith as Bubba Kelsey (at least the Police Academy films had the decency to change his first name from Bubba to Moses); and the 1942 winner of the prestigious “What could his parents have possibly been thinking when they named their kid” award, Dick Butkus. Oh, and the helicopter.

Anyway, this site is about collectibles, and while I don’t think Blue Thunder carries the type of fandom that other shows of the era do, the show was deemed popular enough to get exactly one toy made in conjunction with the TV show: a toy helicopter scaled for action figures made by the generic sounding Mutli-Toys in 1984. And I picked up an example recently to add to my collection.

I will say that, for an older vehicle, this is actually a pretty well done toy. The most important thing to note about it is that it’s not just some random helicopter toy painted blue. This is, without question, the same helicopter from the show, with all the appropriate modifications. Sure, the scale might be a bit off, and the details are such that it looks more like a crude toy than a replica, but if you wanted to recreate all the action from the TV show, this would do a pretty good job.

The toy came with one of the most generic looking pilot action figures ever made. Since this toy was based on the TV show and not the movie, that’s supposed to be Frank Chaney. I have a theory that the pilot was sort of a placeholder, since the copter had a large enough cockpit to accommodate multiple figures in the 3-3/4” scale, as long as they bent at the knees. In other words, Cobra Commander could pilot it, but Boba Fett could not.

This example isn’t perfect, but it’s an incredibly rare toy. Blue Thunder only ran for 11 episodes, so it didn’t have nearly the staying power as the other aforementioned live-action, vehicle-based television shows of the era that also got toys. Plus, it was made by a no-name toy company, so it’s not like it had any chance of getting on the shelves in same quantity that toys made by companies like Mattel or Hasbro had at the time. However, these factors make for rarity, and most collectors who seek this out do so to have an example of a rare toy from the 1980s in their collection.

I bought it knowing it had a significant condition issue (there a piece clipped off on the back of it), but the only way you can appreciate your stuff is if you display it, so my Blue Thunder helicopter will always be facing the right. Likewise, I was fortunate enough to pick up the pilot last year at a toy show in a lot of other stuff I bought, so my total investment for this piece comes out to about $25. That price would have been unheard of a few years ago, but prices seemed to have calmed down as more examples pop up for sale online and awareness of the original television show seems to dwindle.

Still, the next time you play Trivial Pursuit and get the question, “What show starring Bubba Smith and Dick Butkus was centered around a high-tech helicopter?” you’ll know that not only was it Blue Thunder, but it was immortalized in plastic like virtually everything else in the 1980s.

Posted in 1980's, Action Figures, Ben, Toys | 2 Comments

Magic Robo Transforming Gorilla Head!

Posted on April 27, 2012 by

When I was about a freshman in high school, I decided that I wanted to start collecting monkeys.  I don’t know why exactly, but I think it simply comes down to the fact that there is a lot of crazy vintage stuff out there with monkeys on it, and I like crazy vintage stuff.  Also, it is common knowledge that monkeys are hilarious.  Of course, “monkeys” is a very broad genre to collect, so as I got overwhelmed with the crazy monkey goodness that I would come across at flea markets, I decided to focus my sights a little more on only the craziest and most awesome monkeys I could find.  Case in point: Magic Robo Transforming Gorilla Head.

Note:   I am very well aware that gorillas are apes, so I guess if you wanted to get technical you could say that I collect monkeys AND apes.  That being said, I am just going to say monkeys because, well, it’s just so much easier.

Even though all of the directions are written in Japanese, I don’t think it is too hard to figure out how Magic Robo Gorilla works.

The Magic Robo series is a series of four monster heads that transform into robots.  As if it wasn’t cool enough that they made a gorilla, they made a skull, Frankenstein’s monster, and Dracula as well!  Why they aren’t full body monsters is a mystery to me, but the fact that they are only heads adds to the goofiness and awesomeness of the line.  The Magic Robo’s are a cheap knock-off Transformers-esque line also known as “Change Robo” made by Maruka Toys in the 1980’s.  They are all made in Japan.  Here is a site that shows all four monsters in all of their splendor and glory:

http://www22.pos.to/~butto/tto-64.htm

Looking at pictures of the other figures in the line, the gorilla is kind of an anomaly.  He is far more realistically sculpted than the others, and has a sparking mouth action that none of the other robots seem to have.  It is like Maruka Toys was trying to make the gorilla stand out as the best and most awesome Magic Robo.

The robot version of the Magic Robo Gorilla is pretty lame, but I don’t think anyone buys this thing for its robot form.  They buy it because it is a transforming gorilla head that shoots sparks out of its mouth!

This piece is probably one of the crazier monkeys in my collection, and that is saying something because there is a lot of crazy monkey stuff out there.  Truth be told, I would be happy to own any one of the Magic Robo monsters, and maybe someday I will be lucky enough to own a few more, but at least I got the gorilla for my monkey collection.   He is certainly a stand out to say the least.

Posted in 1980's, Action Figures, Amy, Monsters, Toys, Weird | Leave a comment

Shoe Shine Boxes: Free Enterprise at its Most Basic Form

Posted on April 25, 2012 by

When it comes to making a living, there isn’t anything that is more basic than shining shoes.   All you need is a box filled with polish, brushes and rags and you’re ready to go!

Although having someone shine your shoes is pretty much a thing of the past, there was a time when having shiny shoes was part of what it took to look like a successful businessman.  If you think about what the streets of any American city were like in the late nineteenth and early twentieth century, there was a lot going on that could dirty up your shoes in a hurry.   Just think of the mud and dust – not to mention horse manure and it’s easy to realize that the streets weren’t exactly paved with gold.

Like most things I have collected , I didn’t wake up one morning thinking that I was going to buy a shoe shine box.  I simply found one at a flea market and it appealed to me.  There was something about its folksy shabby chic nature that made me appreciate it for its age and the history it represented.  It was also cheap!

I should point out that there are shoe shine boxes –  and there are shoe shine boxes.  The kind I look for are the ones that were used on the streets by someone charging money – usually a nickel or a dime.  I look for boxes that are homemade, usually from scrap pieces of wood and have a footrest on top.  They are often rectangular in shape and have an opening for the polish, brushes, etc. and some reflect the creative nature of their owners.   Most importantly, they must have on them “Shine”, 5 cents or 10 cents or any combination thereof.  Many of the ones I have found still have their contents inside.   These were often used by young boys trying to supplement their family’s income.

The amazing thing to me is how inexpensive they are.  I have purchased them for as little as three dollars with the most expensive one in my collection costing just under sixty dollars.  Most of the ones that I find are in the five to fifteen dollar range.

Because of their homemade nature they are a bit hard to date, but based on how they are made I would say that most of the ones I have found date anywhere from the early 1900’s to possibly as late as 1950 with most falling in the 1920’s through the 1940’s.   I feel they are a bargain considering the history they represent and their visual appeal.

I should also point out that as far as condition is concerned, old and kind of shabby is preferred.   It should show the signs and age and use.    Mint condition is not a good thing on a shoe shine box!

Nearly every time I buy one the dealer says the same thing – “Are you thinking of starting a business?”

 

 

 

Posted in 1900's, 1910's, 1920's, 1930's, Americana, Historical, Jim | 2 Comments

Not Your Average Dummy

Posted on April 23, 2012 by

I don’t remember exactly when Jim and I first visited the Landis Valley Museum out in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, but it was probably in the mid-1970’s.  We were particularly fond of museums like that where various historic buildings – homes, churches, taverns, stores, etc. – were gathered together and furnished authentically.  Both of us agreed that our favorite building at any of these museums was the general store.

Landis Valley had a cute little general store complete with well-stocked shelves, a pot-bellied stove, and a checker board set up on an old barrel.  However, what piqued our interest the most were the two wax mannequin heads, one of a woman and one of a girl.  I’m not totally sure, but I think back at that time they may have been set up for display in the front window of the store.  Heat and light pouring in on them was probably not best for their preservation, and, thankfully, they have been moved further inside the store.  (If you want to see what these mannequins look like, google “Landis Valley Museum general store.”  The first site listed shows photos of the store, and there is a nice portrait of each of the wax heads.)

Jim and I were transfixed by these lovely mannequins because they were so lifelike.  They had realistic glass eyes, what looked like real human hair, and real eyebrows.  Without a doubt, their purpose in a store would be to display the latest in ladies’ hats or bonnets.  (For a little history about these rare display pieces, go to http://www.slstoredisplays.com/blog/labels/wax%20sculpting.html.)  There was something hauntingly beautiful about those mannequins, and I often thought about them.  We probably even said something like, “Wouldn’t it be cool to own one of those wax heads?”

Here is a close up of her glass eye.

These are the mannequin’s dentures.

At the time, we were actively collecting typical general store items – tin and cardboard signs, tobacco tins, wooden boxes, dye cabinets, and spool cabinets.  However, we never saw anything like those wax mannequins for sale.

Then, in 1981, we were returning from our first trip to Maine – the car already packed solid with our “finds” – when we stopped at the market in Brimfield, Massachusetts.  (Yes, our curiosity had gotten the better of us.  So many collectors and dealers had mentioned Brimfield over the years that we purposely planned our vacation to coincide with it.)  As anyone who has ever done Brimfield knows, these multiple markets spread out all along the main highway are absolutely overwhelming in size and scope.  However, Brimfield brings in dealers from far and wide, so the variety of merchandise and the chance of finding something you’ve never seen before increases exponentially.

It was there that we found our own beautiful wax mannequin head, and home she came with us.  We bought a nice straw hat for her to wear and draped a crocheted collar around her neck, and she was good to go.  She remains one of only a handful of wax mannequin heads that we’ve seen either for sale or in museums over the past thirty years.  She has a wonderfully natural skin tone and beautiful glass eyes.  Some may find her too realistic and disturbingly so.  After all, she’s just a head and shoulders without a body.  However, we love her.

We’ve had fun with her, too.  When we first moved into our new house, we placed her inside an empty kitchen cabinet for safe-keeping while we arranged the furniture and collectibles.  Our kids, who were in elementary school at the time, loved surprising guests by opening up the cabinet to show off the realistic lady’s head.  One time, when we lived at our old house, I was out in the side yard talking to the neighbor.  She glanced over at our family room window and asked if that was Jim looking out at us.  When I looked, I realized that she was referring to the wax head, which sat up on top of a cabinet and was perfectly visible from outside.   It did look rather real – although nothing at all like Jim!

If there’s a collecting lesson to be learned from the wax mannequin head, it’s this:  When you see an antique or collectible object that strikes an emotional chord within you, there’s a good chance that someday you will stumble upon that object (or something similar) and be able to acquire it.  It’s one of those strange phenomenons that I’ve noticed many times over the years, and when it happens, it’s downright spooky.  Of course, I still have a fair-sized list of things that I’m waiting to find at an affordable price, but I haven’t given up hope yet.  And when I see something I love and, for whatever reason, it’s unobtainable, I always say, “Someday I’m going to find one of those for my own,” or, as I did with the wax head, “Wouldn’t it be cool to have one of those someday?”

Posted in 1800's, Advertising, Americana, Carol, Historical, Weird | 2 Comments

Kojak

Posted on April 17, 2012 by

“Who loves ya, baby?”

Okay, now that I have the obligatory introduction to any mention of the character Kojak, I can talk about this action figure that I picked up earlier this year. That’s right!  There’s a Kojak action figure!

I’m always sort of relieved I grew up in the 1980s, because the action figures of the 1970s left a little something to be desired, at least in the United States. Beyond Mego’s superheroes and Micronauts and Kenner’s Star Wars, action figures of the 1970s were a little more grounded in reality than the robots, demons, barbarians, sorcerers, and other strange denizens that made up my toy collection in the following decades. As such, many action figure lines drew their inspiration from the heroes that kids were familiar with on television.

Mego certainly capitalized on the vast majority of available TV licenses. They produced everything from Planet of the Apes to Star Trek to Starsky and Hutch to even One Million B.C., and they were all produced in the same 8-inch scale, meaning that they could all interact with one another.

Excel Toy Corporation must have been desperate to steal a little bit of success away from Mego. In the early 1970s, the company was responsible for two different toy lines based on historical characters that were in a slightly larger 9-1/2-inch scale. In their Legends of the West line, they made figures of Annie Oakley, Buffalo Bill Cody, and Jesse James, among others. In their Military Legends line, they covered everyone from George Washington all the way to General Dwight Eisenhower and even Admiral William Halsey, Jr. Hey, it was all public domain, so I guess they took whoever their toy sculptors could churn out.

However, producing a Kojak action figure was a bit of a departure. It was in an 8-inch scale, just like the Mego figures, so Telly Savalas could fight General Ursus or the Gorn or any number of other Mego figures and not look out of place…well, in terms of scale at least. Kojak was on television before I was born, but growing up in a household of retro sensibilities, I know enough about the show to know he was tough but loveable cop. Cops are the good guys, cops carry guns…good enough for an action figure, I suppose!

Collectible toys have come a long way in terms of sculpting, but even in the 1970s, especially with Mego, you could tell what actor the sculptor was going for in most cases. Other than being bald, I think it’s safe to say Kojak looks absolutely nothing like Telly Savalas. Then again, I don’t think there were many bald action figures in 1976. In that regard, I guess you could say Excel Toy Corporation was a pioneer!

Speaking of 1976, by that point, Kojak had been on the air for about three seasons. I think that’s a smart move. Many times these days, when action figures are designed to promote a particular television show or movie, the rights are often snapped up before their popularity has been proven. This is why toys from last year’s “Green Lantern” movie are still warming pegs even after deep, deep discounts. By 1976, Kojak’s popularity had been proven, so even if the toy looked nothing like the actor, at least name recognition carried a lot of weight by that point.

Normally, I don’t gravitate toward items that were made before I was born, since I don’t have that childhood attachment to them like I do with stuff made post-1983, but I thought this figure was too cool to pass up when I saw it for sale at a toy show in Maryland in January. It was marked $50, which I didn’t think was a bad price considering it was still on the card, but the bargain hunter in me needed to be sated that day, and so I got the price knocked down to $40 without too much trouble.

The card is a little rough, and I’m certainly not a fan of that weird blue spot on his face, but otherwise, I’d say it’s in decent shape. Here’s the thing: I cannot possibly imagine trying to find a loose complete example.

Finding one in nice shape with the outfit intact with his hat and gun? That’s probably not too difficult a task. Finding one with the lollipops and the glasses, which were so small and clear that I spent several minutes figuring out if they were still in the package? Yeah, that’s going to prove a challenge. However, I have to give Excel credit for including these small but key accessories. In lieu of not being able to smoke on television after 1971, Kojak sucking on lollipops became one of the most memorable images of 1970s television.

What I love about this piece is that it’s sort of a one-and-done line. If I wanted to go crazy, I’d try and track down Kojak in his blue outfit instead of this pinstripe number here, along with his trench coat and accessory set, and if I was really insane, I’d look for the mail-away police headquarters set complete with “bad guy” action figure (I’m not kidding, that’s what they called the only other figure they made for this line), but I won’t. I don’t need an entire collection to let people who see my collection know that indeed they made a Kojak action figure. It’s ridiculous and fun in its own way, which makes it stand out, and if it achieves those things, I’m going to want to own it at some point.

BONUS: USELESS TRIVIA! When you collect the kinds of things that I do, you end up learning way too much about pop culture. So here are two utterly useless facts that you’ll never get asked at pub trivia:

1.)    DID YOU KNOW that Telly Savalas has a connection to the 1980s toy line Go-Bots? He provided the voice of the villain Magmar in the 1986 Go-Bots movie “Go-Bots: War of the Rock Lords.” By that logic, there are technically two Telly Savalas action figures. I’d say the Kojak figure looks slightly more like Savalas than the Rock Lords Magmar figure, but only VERY slightly.

2.)    DID YOU KNOW that in 2005, the USA network rebooted Kojak and cast Ving Rhames as the title character? Not surprisingly, it lasted one season. I know Hollywood is completely out of original ideas, but I don’t know what it’s going to take to get them to stop rebooting TV shows from the 1960s or 1970s. Or if you’re going to do it, do something crazy like reboot “Man From Atlantis.”

Posted in 1970's, Action Figures, Ben, Toys | 3 Comments

The Hawaiian Cottage

Posted on April 13, 2012 by

Tiki mugs are one of my many collections that fit into the mid-century category of collecting.  They are colorful, whimsical, and I can usually pick them up for not a lot of money at flea markets.  Though many different mug designs were available for mass market consumption, and new mugs are still being created today, some of the best designs were created for specific restaurants.  Because very few of these Polynesian restaurants of the ‘50’s and ‘60’s had more than one location, these mugs have become desirable for tiki mug collectors.

A lot of times tiki’s are very brown.

Polynesian themed objects really came into vogue when Hawaii became our 50th state in 1959, but people have always been attracted to the lures of Hawaii and objects that remind them of tropical places.  Polynesian themed restaurants, though much more prevalent in warmer climate and coastal states, became popular all over the country.

Of course, being from New Jersey means that regional mugs are a little bit hard to come by because, well, there were never really many Polynesian restaurants to choose from. There was, however, one spectacular restaurant present in Cherry Hill, NJ.

It was called the Hawaiian Cottage, and it opened its doors in 1938.  It is important to understand a little bit about Cherry Hill in the 1950’s.  First of all it didn’t become known as Cherry Hill until 1961, before that it was Merchantville, NJ.  Second, it was very different from the chain restaurant and chain store mecca it has become in more recent years.  Cherry Hill was home to The Latin Casino, which didn’t have gambling but hosted some of the biggest music and comedy acts of the day.  It was also home to the Garden State Park horse racing track, hotels, and many high end restaurants including the Hawaiian Cottage.  Outside of the entertainment industry that was so present in Cherry Hill, there was also a building boom of housing developments, which included among more traditional houses some spectacular Mid-Century Modern homes including a Frank Lloyd Wright designed house.  Besides houses, the one aspect of early Cherry Hill that still remains is the Cherry Hill Mall, which is considered the first indoor shopping mall east of the Mississippi.  When it comes to shopping and entertainment, the mall is the only thing that still remains.  Everything else has pretty much been bulldozed to make way for newer shopping and dining.  The site of the Hawaiian Cottage is now home to an Olive Garden.

http://maps.google.com/maps?saddr=Olive+Garden+near+Cherry+Hill+Mall,+Cherry+Hill,+NJ&hl=en&ll=39.940103,-75.012573&spn=0.000518,0.001321&sll=39.935037,-75.04647&sspn=0.008292,0.021136&oq=Olive+Garden,cherry&t=h&mra=ls&z=20&layer=c&cbll=39.940103,-75.012573&panoid=NjV0iH9o6POPVPi-uECznw&cbp=12,347.89,,0,-3.86

This is a link to the Google Map of the current Olive Garden

No offense to the architect and designer of the Olive Garden, but your building is lacking a giant pineapple on the roof.  I sure wish that my drive down Route 38 still included a giant pineapple roofed building today.  Alas, the only remains of The Hawaiian Cottage are the little bit of memorabilia that resides at flea markets and on eBay including match books, postcards, menus, and tiki mugs.

One of the most interesting things about The Hawaiian Cottage’s mug choices is that they are in no way typical when it comes to tiki mugs.  Most restaurants chose designs based on tiki idols or Easter Island Heads.  These, on the other hand, represent tropical birds and Geisha’s.  They were made by a company called Otagiri, which was a fairly major manufacturer of tiki mugs in the 50’s and 60’s.

The parrot mug was the first Hawaiian Cottage mug I was able to procure, and at first it seemed very hard to find.  I actually paid $15 to get one, which was the most I had ever paid for a mug at that time.  I had to have it though, because it was such a cool mug and the history fascinated me.  Since then, however, I have managed to find about 6 more and have paid as little as $1 to get them.  That being said, I am shopping within a pretty close proximity to the original restaurant.  If you are going to find this mug anywhere, it is most likely to be close to where the restaurant originally stood.    No matter how many parrot mugs I rescue, it is still my favorite mug in my collection because it represents so much more to me than the average tiki mug.  Also, no other restaurant made a parrot mug as far as I am aware, which makes it very unique and special.

There are two variations on this mug that I have been able to find.  I don’t know that one is rarer than the other, but the main differences are in their size and color.  They have about a quarter inch difference between them, and the smaller mug is a more orange red, whereas the taller mug is more fire engine red.  There are modern replicas of this mug on the market as well that also come in other colors such as blue, green and yellow, but the easiest way to tell a genuine Hawaiian Cottage mug is that it has the name around the base.  Newer copies don’t have that.

This Geisha Room mug, however, has been a little bit tougher for me to come by.  I have only been able find this one for my collection.  It isn’t the most obvious tiki mug, but Asian themed mugs are somewhat prevalent in tiki mug design.  A lot of Polynesian restaurants also served Asian cuisine, and some Chinese and Japanese restaurants had Polynesian themes to their decor.  There are two different versions of this mug as well.  The one I have pictured is the larger of the two.  Both mugs are very similar looking just like the parrots, but the smaller one has less writing on the back and is white on the bottom, whereas the larger mug is black on the bottom.

I have also heard rumor, though I haven’t found one myself, that there is a Fu Manchu mug design with the Hawaiian Cottage Name Stamped on the back.  It would most likely look a lot like this fella.  It isn’t quite as unique as the other two mugs, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t want one for my collection.

The Hawaiian Cottage closed its doors sometime in the 1970’s, and burned down later in the decade.  I was born too late to have ever been able to lay my eyes upon its pineapple dome.  Most people today probably don’t know that it ever existed.  The one amazing thing about collecting, though, is that we who are willing to rummage through boxes of junk at flea markets and yard sales end up finding these little relics from the past that remind us of what has come before us.  So, the next time you are driving down Rt.38 in Cherry Hill, NJ and you happen to decide that you are in the mood for some Olive Garden, think of how much cooler it would be to be sitting under a giant concrete pineapple drinking out of a parrot.

Posted in 1950's, 1960's, Amy, Polynesian, Pottery | 5 Comments